Beloved: Sasuke and Mikoto
by SilenceEchoes39
Summary: "Sasuke..?" The boy froze, and that nostalgic feeling returned to him, stronger than ever before. He knew that voice. Ever so slowly, the boy turned. His mind wavered. "Sasuke..." He never thought he would ever see her again...


..."You... I hated... you"...

... "Then why... why did you... protect me!?"...

... "I don't know my body just moved on its own... there was no time... to think."...

... "Naruto... don't let... your dream die..."...

..."SASUKE!"...

When Sasuke Uchiha opened his eyes, the first thought that came to his mind was 'am I dead?' It was a stupid question, he knew, of course he was dead. The last memory the twelve-year-old Uchiha had was of his spiky haired teammate, Naruto Uzumaki – his comrade, his rival, his friend... and the boy he had given his life for. Sasuke remembered it so clearly that there was no doubt in his mind that he was dead. The only thing that puzzled him is that if he was dead, then why did he find himself sitting in the middle of a field of flowers?  
Hesitantly, Sasuke rose to his feet – albeit a little unsteadily – and took in his surroundings. Purple tulips were the first thing Sasuke noticed since that was all he could see for miles, it was like an endless sea of purple. The sky was a bright blue, but there was not a cloud to be seen and what Sasuke found most strange of all was that there was no sign of the sun.  
"What is this place?" Sasuke muttered to himself.  
Was this what the afterlife looked like? If so, Sasuke was quite stunned seeing as he was never the type of person to believe in such things. As Sasuke continued to turn his head from side to side, examining his surroundings, he found himself overcome with nostalgia for a fleeting moment.  
Purple tulips, they were his mother's favourite. He recalled buying a bouquet of them for her on her birthday once. He still remembered the look on her face when he held them out to her. It had been a look so radiant and heart warming, so full of love and pride, Sasuke even caught a glimpse of tear shining in the corner of her eye. But strangely enough to the young Uchiha, the look had not been directed at the flowers.  
"Sasuke..?"  
The boy froze, and that nostalgic feeling returned to him, stronger than ever before.  
He knew that voice.  
Ever so slowly, the boy turned. His mind wavered.  
"Sasuke..."  
He never thought he would ever see her again, and his eyes glazed over as he stared at his mother, who had appeared before him.  
She was just as beautiful as he had remembered. Her long silky black hair fell delicately over her shoulders and her bangs roughly framed her soft face. The complexion of her pale skin seemed to glow in the brightness their surroundings cast around them. And her face... the face that looked so much like his own that it was like a mirror image, glistened with the trails of fallen tears that seeped down her gentle black eyes.  
"M-My son..." In a few quick steps, Mikoto Uchiha rushed towards the frozen boy and took Sasuke into her arms in one fluid motion.  
She held his body firmly to hers and Sasuke felt the air leave him and his arms tremble at his sides when he felt the familiar yet somehow foreign warmth of his mother's embrace. The warmth of the contact had always been a comfort to Sasuke and it was comfort that had been sorely - no excruciatingly- missed.  
Sasuke moved his arms despite the trembles that racked them and held them up until his hands hovered just above his mother's back. Sasuke hesitated, afraid that if he touched her she would just disappear. Slowly he brought his trembling hands down to rest on the small of his mother's back and something between a choking sound and a sob escaped his throat when the simple contact was rewarded by the solidness of a real body. Sasuke closed his eyes and buried his face into the purple fabric of his mother's blouse at the same time that Mikoto brought a hand up to cradle the back of Sasuke's head.  
Mum.  
That was the only word that was running through Sasuke's mind at the moment. His mother was here! She was here and holding him like she had done so many times in the past.  
"Mum... I... mum." Sasuke's choked out; he just couldn't find it in himself to form a proper sentence.  
"Oh, Sasuke... what are you doing here?" Mikoto whispered, pure emotion dripping out of every syllable.  
"I... I was on a... a mission and..." Sasuke swallowed to surpress the bile rising in his throat. He was so overcome with shock and emotion at everything that was happening that he felt as though he was going to double over and be sick. "I... my partner was in danger so I... I jumped in and... Protected him..."  
Upon hearing those words, Mikoto opened her eyes and gazed down through watery eyes at the mess of raven- black hair that was pressed against the hollow of her shoulder.  
So her son had finally become a ninja, just like she and Fugaku had always hoped. Despite the pride Mikoto felt at hearing her son's words, she couldn't help the heart wrenching feeling that her little Sasuke had protected a comrade at the expense of his own life.  
"...But..." Sasuke's voice was shaky like he was on the verge of breaking down. "It should have been you... it should have been you who I protected... You and father... and auntie and uncle and the rest of the clan!"  
"Shh, it's okay, sweetie." Mikoto hushed her son while rubbing soothing circles into his back, just like she would do when he was a child and had just woken up from a nightmare.  
"It's not... it's not. I should have been there... I should have come back earlier; I should've done something... I should have stopped him!"  
Mikoto pulled away from their embrace but keeping a firm grip on Sasuke's shoulders, she bent down slightly so that she was eye level with her son.  
"Sasuke, look at me."  
Sasuke found himself unable to defy his mother's gentle command and his teary onyx eyes looked into her shimmering black ones. A soft smile, with underlying sympathy was present upon her face as she kept her gaze fastened on Sasuke.  
"There was nothing you could have done." Mikoto said, her tone gentle yet firm as she brought her hands up to delicately cup her boy's pale cheeks. "What happened happened. Focusing on the 'what if's' and blaming yourself aren't going to change anything."  
Feeling more tears beginning to surface, Sasuke closed his eyes and took in a shaky inhale of breath, still feeling his mother's light and gentle touch upon his either side of his face.  
Mikoto brushed some stray strands of hair from her son's face and gazed at the Leaf village symbol engraved on the metallic plate that covered Sasuke's forehead and smiled.  
Sasuke looked up when he heard something tap against his forehead protector.  
"So my youngest son is finally a shinobi."  
Sasuke couldn't help the twitching at the corners of his lips and the small smile that made its way onto his face at his mother's observation.  
"Why don't we go someplace else and you can tell me everything." Mikoto suggested.  
By everything, Sasuke knew that his mother meant everything that had happened up to this point. He knew his mother wanted to know about the many events that she had missed in her son's life and Sasuke was more than happy to oblige and inform her.

Mikoto had taken Sasuke to a small hill that over looked the rest of the tulip field and they sat under the shade of the large oak tree that was perched atop the hill. It was there that Sasuke told his mother all about the life he had just given up. Mikoto listened intently to every word that left her son's mouth. She was happy to hear what Sasuke had to say, but deep down she was saddened that she had not been able to be there and experience these things with him. That knowledge caused Mikoto more pain than any parent would wish to endure.  
Sasuke had just ended his tale of his first A-Ranked mission as a member of Team 7 and Mikoto held her inner turmoil at bay.  
"It's no surprise that your seemingly C-Rank mission turned out to be an A-Rank, your sensei is Kakashi Hatake after all, he could never be normal." Mikoto giggled, recalling the renowned shinobi when he was just an adolescent. So filled with talent at such a young age yet he had been hardened by the war and didn't seem anything like the child he should have been.  
"Yeah, he's definitely not your average jonin." Sasuke sighed; an image of his former masked sensei's face came into his mind. "By the way, did you know that he has a sharingan in his left eye?" Sasuke questioned his mother.  
Mikoto seemed to hesitate, as if contemplating whether she should really tell her son the truth of Kakashi's left eye.  
"Yes, as I recall it he got it when he was only thirteen."  
"But how, I thought the sharingan was something only an Uchiha could inherit?" Sasuke asked.  
Mikoto smiled once more at Sasuke before leaning towards him and placing a hand on his head and running her delicate fingers through each strand.  
"That's a story for another time and seeing as I don't know the full details, I'm not sure how much of a reliable source I would be."  
"It doesn't have to be the whole truth; just the basics will do fine." Sasuke tried to compromise.  
Mikoto's smile broadened. Curiosity was most certainly one thing about her son that hadn't changed.  
"No, I think it's better to hear it from someone who knows the full story."  
"If you insist." Sasuke sighed, trying to remain nonchalant about it though inside he was disappointed that his mother wouldn't tell him.  
A peaceful silence hung around them for a few minutes and in that time, Mikoto thought back to the orange clad genin her son had told her about.  
"Sasuke,"  
"Hm?"  
"Tell me about your teammate, this... Naruto Uzumaki, what's he like?" Mikoto asked.  
"Why do you want to know about Naruto?" Sasuke asked, confused.  
"I'm curious." Mikoto answered with a delicate shrug of her shoulders.  
Sasuke regarded his mother with a sceptical look before tilting his head upward to gaze at the cluster of leaves that hung above their heads, recollecting all the memories he had of the dobe.  
"Naruto... He's loud, obnoxious and a complete dobe." Sasuke explained and heard his mother giggle at the nickname he had given Naruto. "He was always challenging me and trying to prove he was better than me, but I always beat him." Sasuke paused for a moment and Mikoto saw an almost affectionate smirk make itself known on her son's face. "He would always go on about how one day he'd be the strongest ninja ever and become Hokage and while he was a complete idiot, I'll admit he knew how to keep persevering despite the odds."  
While listening to Sasuke's explanation of his old teammate, Mikoto couldn't help but be reminded of her own friend – her best friend – Kushina Uzumaki. From Sasuke's description, Naruto had definitely inherited his mother's personality.  
"It's funny how you call the person you sacrificed yourself for a 'complete idiot'." Mikoto teased her son and ruffled his hair a bit.  
"Yeah, well... my body just moved so..." Sasuke shrugged not wanting to get into detail about his past actions.  
But Mikoto knew that Naruto was more than just some mere nuisance to her son – his actions proved that much.  
"Mum... I..."  
"What is it, Sasuke?" Mikoto asked, troubled by the tone of Sasuke's voice.  
"Ever since that night... I... I wanted to kill him... I wanted revenge so badly."  
Mikoto's eyes dropped into her lap and her expression lost all cheeriness. For a moment Sasuke was afraid that he had upset his mother. He had never seen her look so serious before and he could have sworn he saw a hint of remorse across her features.  
"I... I mean... he killed you and father and the whole clan, so... How do you... feel about him?"  
That was one question Sasuke wanted answered. Itachi had slaughtered the entire clan for the mere reason of testing his capacity. So... where did Mikoto's feelings for her eldest son lie.  
The answer was simple but, Sasuke couldn't see that.  
"Yes, he killed our entire clan... but I don't hate him." Upon seeing Sasuke's surprised expression, Mikoto decided to elaborate. "He's my son after all just as much as you are. And even if I wanted to, I could never hate my son."  
"So... you still love him, even though he was the one that murdered you and father?"  
Mikoto turned her head to directly look at Sasuke with a smile once again present on her beautiful face. Just that expression was confirmation enough for Sasuke to know that his mother still loved Itachi as much as any parent could love their child. Mikoto had never been a hateful person, so why would she ever consider hating her own flesh and blood? Yet it still didn't seem to sit right with Sasuke, but he decided not push the subject, since it was clear that his mother wasn't all that comfortable with the situation.  
In the silence that followed, Sasuke couldn't help but gaze at the kunoichi that sat beside him. Her complexion was pale yet it had a radiant glow to it. Her expression tranquil, her eyes gentle. This beautiful woman here next to him, was his mother, the mother that had been taken away from him far too early. Sasuke couldn't shake the feeling of guilt and regret over his mother's death. He should have been there that night. He should have done something to stop it. He should have protected everyone.  
"Hey mum, have you ever been in a position where you weren't able to save someone precious to you?" Sasuke asked in a low voice, not taking his eyes off of the blades of grass.  
Mikoto didn't even need to take her time to consider her answer. It was immediate.  
"As a matter of fact... I have."  
Sasuke raised his eyes to look at his mother curiously.  
"Y-You have? When?" Sasuke asked.  
"About thirteen years ago I believe, one of my closest friends was killed during the Nine Tail's attack... and I didn't learn of her death until the next day."  
"And... how did that make you feel?" Sasuke asked cautiously. He had never heard his mother talk about this friend before even though she claimed that they were one of her closest friends, so he assumed that maybe it was painful to talk about.  
"They told me that... it wasn't my fault, that there was nothing I could have done and in reality there wasn't." Mikoto explained. "But just thinking about what could've happened if I had have been there if I could have... protected her... well it made me feel as though it was my fault simply for not being there to help her."  
So his mother was a victim of the feeling too; the feeling of gut wrenching guilt of having not been able to protect those important to you.  
"But as I came to realise, there are just some things that you cannot protect." Mikoto stated sadly. "It's true that that unbridled feeling of wanting to protect someone is one of the most important strengths there is, but fate is out of our hands and sometimes you just can't protect those you wish to. Just like I couldn't protect Kushina... and like I couldn't protect you."  
Sasuke was silent as his mother told him this. There was a stirring in his heart that he couldn't ignore. There were some things he couldn't change. His parents were dead. It was now- that he realized - he accepted that.  
Sasuke meant to say more when he felt a strange sensation overcome him and when he looked at his hands he saw they were glowing white along with the rest of his body. What did this mean? A little frightened and confused, Sasuke turned to his mother. She was smiling at him.  
"It seems your time in the world of the living isn't over yet, Sasuke."  
"So... you mean..."  
"As I told you, my son; fate is out of our hands." Mikoto said. "It seems your fate isn't to say here... I'm glad." A single tear rolled down Mikoto's porcelain skin.  
So he was leaving? A part of him was relieved but the other part of him didn't want to go. He wanted to stay with his mother, ask her so many more questions and stay wrapped up in the comfort of her arms.  
"M-mum... I..." His vision was beginning to fade, and Mikoto and the scenery around them were being consumed by a blinding whiteness.  
"I'll send your love to your father!" Mikoto called out before she completely faded away. "He'd like that."  
And before Sasuke knew it... she was gone.

***

...*Sob, sob*...

... "Sakura... you're heavy..."...

... "Sasuke... SASUKEE!"...

... "Sakura... that hurts."...


End file.
